The 10 Month Update

These updates sure do creep up on me so quickly! I wouldn't mind if time would slow down a bit.  This past weekend, on December 7th, our little girl turned 10 months. The age is symbolic in our world because it means she is ready to be moved up into the older infant classroom at her school. Since the school is closed two weeks at the holidays, we decided to wait until after the new year to switch her over full time. During this month, she'll spend a few hours a few days a week with the older kids to help with the transition. I don't expect it will be a challenge since Rose seems to prefer the older kids, and two of her friends just moved into the older class last month.

Rose is happy to be 10 months!

Sporting a 12 month outfit

Here's a summary of Rose at 10 Months:

The big news this month is that Rose got her ears pierced.  In the Portuguese culture, it's common for little girls to have their ears pierced within a few months.  I was torn because I wanted her ears pierced, but couldn't stomach the thought of actually having it done.  Our Brazilian neighbor recommended her dermatologist who pierced her daughter's ears and we were told they would only do it until a child's 1st birthday or we'd have to wait until she was older (like 6-7 years).  We decided to have it done the week before Thanksgiving. Rose screamed when the "gun" punctured the ear, but was fine within 30 seconds of it being done. She really is a tough girl.  Maybe people will stop mistaking Rose for a boy now that she has earrings.  That hair just isn't growing fast enough!

Our mobile "cruiser" is close to walking. She walks all over the place with some assistance. Sometimes she'll walk with the help of our hands, but more often she will alternate between crawling and standing holding a stationary item. With us, she loves alternating between walking slow and very fast.  When she's playing with things on the table, she often uses both hands, leaving her standing unassisted for a short period of time. One of these days she is going to forget to hold onto something and just start walking.  As you can see from the videos, she's a very busy girl at 10 months!

Rose still loves saying goodbye to everyone with her full arm wave, or her Ciao, Bella wave.

She and daddy are saying Ciao Bella to mommy

After her slight head cold while traveling for Thanksgiving, Rose caught another bug at school. This time, the bug infected the whole house! We were all pretty miserable last week with a stomach bug that started with Rose, passed to me, and even managed to get Colin. Thankfully we weren't sick at the same time. Rose fought the bug quickly with a couple episodes of vomiting in the early morning hours on Tuesday.  I didn't get sick until Thursday afternoon/evening, and Colin got sick on Friday afternoon/evening. Colin usually has a stomach of steel, so for him to get sick, it must have been a bad one.  Rose got over the bug like a champ and really didn't act sick.  Her symptoms were a few episodes of vomiting and diarrhea.  I on the other hand, seriously debated going to urgent care after being sick for 4 hours!  Colin said he's probably only had one stomach bug in his life that was worse than this one.  I should be grateful that Rose doesn't complain much and that she recovers from illness quickly, but I am ready for her to stop catching stuff at school! 

Rose still loves to say yell "ma-ma-ma", "ba-ba-ba" and the occasional "da-da."  She also learned how to make fun sounds with the teachers at school.

Rose still eats what we eat and loves her grapes and meat. Over Thanksgiving break we ate a fair amount of turkey and had meatballs a few times. Rose had no complaints with those menu items. She's also good at eating her vegetables. Rose hasn't tried desserts or nuts yet.  We also haven't done fish in awhile. I'm excited to report that we've made it another month without formula.  I think we are now in the clear since Rose eats so well. I did notice a drop in supply when I had the stomach bug, but Rose seems like she gets enough even when she gets less.

Rose seems to be having longer stretches of sleep at night, and since we got back from Thanksgiving, she's done a great job soothing herself to sleep.  We've gotten into a better routine of bed by 7:30p, and she's been waking up on her own (fairly happy) around 7am. For the most part, she still wakes up once a night to nurse (around 12-1a), but we sometimes experience a full night's sleep.  I continue to hope that sleeping through the night becomes a regular occurrence in our house again.  While Rose still takes a power nap of 30 minutes once or twice a day, she's had more frequent episodes of sleeping 1-2 hours during her nap at home and at school.  

We continue to use cloth diapers at all times except overnight, and it seems like Rose is leaking less. Last month I was worried about stretched elastics, but I think the problem was lack of absorbency. There is a whole science to cloth diapering that I can get into (maybe another post), but you have to "strip" your diapers once in awhile. The stripping removes buildup from chemicals released in urine (ammonia) and from buildup that might occur in detergent. With traveling and using washing machines at our family's houses, I wasn't able to wash the diapers in my usual way. Poor Rose ended up with ammonia burn (a bad diaper rash) from the drive home that cleared as soon as I stripped the diapers, let her bottom air out, and used some shea butter diaper cream. I just stripped the diapers by washing the diapers through a few extra cycles (one of which had bleach).  Next time we head north, I might try to bring some detergent that is to be used with hard water to see if that cleans the diapers better.

Now on to some of this month's pictures...

Pecan picking at Oak View County Park in Raleigh

Our ticklish girl

Intently observing mommy put together the Christmas tree

Enjoying the colors and textures of the Christmas tree

Dressed in an outfit from Portugal, Rose is ready for a
Portuguese dinner with the Portuguese Association of North Carolina

Finding the right foods to bring to the dinner

Satisfied with so much delicious Portuguese food
and enjoying being the center of attention!

A Trip Down Memory Lane

Last week, I had the opportunity to gather with fellow Portuguese people here in North Carolina and a monthly dinner sponsored by the "Portuguese Association of North Carolina (PANC)."  As the group, now a non-profit organization, looks to build the organization, I find myself thinking about my upbringing and my culture.

For those of you who don't know, I grew up in a very close-knit Portuguese community in Rhode Island.  Our community offered lots of opportunities to get together with other Portuguese families in a variety of settings.  I frequently half-joke with people that my life was a little like the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding."  I went to Portuguese school as an after-school program, gossip spread like wildfire, and it was/is more common for a Portuguese person to date and marry a fellow Portuguese person that to be with an "American."

I'll never forget the day, my sophomore year of college, when we talked about gemienschaft versus a gesellschaft in my sociology class.  At the time, I had only lived in my hometown and in the college community in Burlington, Vermont and knew that I had always lived in a gemeinschaft, where my beliefs and actions were more a result of the large association of my community (the Portuguese community in RI and the college community in VT), as opposed to my own self-interest.  Sure, I had non-Portuguese friends and did things that were uncommon from tradition as I grew up, but, for the most part, my world revolved around being Portuguese.

From grades 2-7, I attended Portuguese school in the evenings, learning about the culture, language, history, and geography of this small country.  I can still remember most of the 13 provinces, the first president, many of the explorers, and some of the major rivers.  In 4th grade, I started taking clarinet lessons in school, and joined our Portuguese social club's band, like many of my peers.  Shortly thereafter, I also joined one of the two Portuguese folk dancing groups in our town.  The band and the folk dancing group usually attended the same events (there is a feast for a saint in almost every Portuguese town in RI and southeastern MA every weekend from June to August), so I'd go from being in my band outfit for the marching parade, to my folk outfit to perform, and lastly into some "normal" clothes to hang out with friends, and dance at the feast.

My social club's band continues to march in parades all over RI
Photo courtesy of the Lusitania Club's Facebook page 

My folk dancing group continues to perform all over RI
Photo courtesy of my former director's Facebook page 

My social club continues hold a feast celebrating St. John every June and the church hosts an Our Lady of Fatima Feast Labor Day weekend.  A feast is 3 nights of live music, cultural performances, lots of food/alcohol and crowds like you see here.
Photo courtesy of the Lusitania Club's Facebook page 

If you can imagine, I was a pretty busy kid.  These events were things I did to celebrate my culture, but I was also into sports and played year-round competitive soccer for most of my life.  I guess when you're so busy with extra-curricular activities, there is no time to get into trouble.  

Though it seemed like a lot, I enjoyed it.  It was fun to meet lots of people, have friends to do these things with, and experience a variety of things the Portuguese and the American world had to offer.  I hardly ever sat around watching TV, never played video games, and never remember thinking that I was bored.  In fact, I went to Montreal and New Jersey a few times with the band, and even went to Portugal, a tour that included playing at the President's palace!  I can't think of very many kids who had a more enriching youth.

After finishing up 6 years of college and grad school, I had my first experience living in a gesellschaft.  NYC is the epitome of a gesellschaft  - a place where almost everyone acts in their own self interest and defies social and cultural norms.  After spending 24 years living in places with "built-in" communities, I struggled to define my interests and find a place to fit in.  I had spent all my life trying to excel within cultural and societal norms (which were very different in RI, VT, and Tennessee).  

In NYC, I met, and became friends with, some Portuguese people who worked with me and played soccer with me, but going to their feasts was just not the same (although it was funny to see some of my RI friends at the feasts in Newark!!).  Even the friends I made playing soccer were nice, but I just struggled to find my niche.  I didn't know how to act in a gesellschaft - it made me realize that I had to define what I wanted for myself and what I enjoyed.  It was not an easy process to initiate and it is a process that will likely continue throughout my life.

My "gemeinschaft" in NYC ultimately became my home.  The cultural and societal norms that defined my actions became the things my husband and I did together - like hiking, playing volleyball, running, joining a community supported agriculture program (CSA) and traveling- which were things were both enjoyed.  And I still did some things with friends I made in the city - like playing soccer and going out dancing.

I still struggle to act in my own self interest - Colin is a lot better at it than I am.  I'm certainly not saying that is the better way to be or that I want to completely just think about me.  There are wonderful benefits to being a part of a close community - people look out for each other and help each other when needed, there are lots of opportunities to be social, etc.  But, I admire those who can do things for themselves to be truly happy, especially those whose self interests benefit others and society as a whole.  That is what I aspire for myself.

So, while the Portuguese Association of North Carolina (PANC) looks to provide a gemeinschaft for families here, I will continue to attend the monthly dinners when I can.  Through these dinners, perhaps I will find an opportunity to help the group with their endeavor through something that satisfies my own self interest.

Last week's Portuguese dinner included several delicious entrees.

Not to brag, but my bacalhau (white dish) was a hit!!